We’ve all been there. In a new job, on a first date, trying to fit in with a new group—the pressure to present ourselves in a certain light can be intense. Sometimes, that pressure leads us to adopt a persona, a carefully constructed version of ourselves we believe will be more accepted, desired, successful, or liked. But is this constant act of “faking our personas” healthy in the long run?

One perspective is a resounding no. Trying to be someone you’re not can feel like a deep betrayal of your true self. As one thought puts it, it’s like “stabbing your feet,” hindering your ability to walk your authentic path. When you’re genuinely yourself, you naturally gravitate towards activities and people that resonate with your interests, opening doors to opportunities you might otherwise miss. You create your own reality by being true to yourself. Conversely, pretending to be someone else can be incredibly draining and you may, sooner or later, get lost and psychologically dislocated. Think about it: constantly monitoring your words, actions, and reactions to maintain a facade is exhausting.

Research is starting to back this up. A study examining emerging adults’ self-presentation on Facebook revealed an interesting connection between identity and well-being. Those with a strong, coherent sense of self were more likely to present their real selves online. On the flip side, people with a less clear sense of identity and lower self-esteem were more inclined to showcase a false self. This suggests that a shaky sense of who you are might fuel the need to create a fabricated online persona.

What are the actual health consequences of faking your persona?

Faking a personality can have a surprisingly far-reaching impact on your well-being. The constant mental effort required to maintain a false persona can lead to chronic stress. You’re always “on guard,” worried about slipping up and revealing your true self. This constant state of alert can contribute to anxiety disorders, which negatively impacts your well-being.

Ironically, faking a personality in the hopes of gaining acceptance often backfires. It reinforces the belief that your authentic self isn’t good enough. This can lead to a cycle of low self-esteem and the need to maintain the facade even more rigidly. Ultimately, low self-esteem makes your social interactions less enjoyable and can inhibit your growth as a person and your long-term social health.

Living a life that doesn’t align with your values and true self can lead to feelings of emptiness and disconnect. The disconnect from your true self could potentially be tied to depression. These feelings of disconnect, when left to their own devices, may grow into deeper negative issues such as substance abuse (heavily drinking or consuming entertainment drugs) and social isolation.

While the initial intention may be to impress or connect, inauthentic relationships are often shallow and unsatisfying. People may be drawn to the persona you’ve created, but not to the real you, leading to a sense of isolation. Overtime, these relationships can falter and create a negative image for future social interactions.

Chronic stress, stemming from maintaining the facade, can manifest in physical symptoms like headaches, digestive issues, and even a weakened immune system. The mind-body connection is powerful, and emotional distress can certainly impact physical health. These health problems can manifest in your everyday life and make simple things such as focusing or being active, harder to do.

If you’re constantly focused on being someone else, you lose touch with your own goals and desires. You might find yourself drifting through life without a clear sense of purpose. That, in turn, can lead to feelings of hopelessness and a lack of motivation.

It takes courage to be yourself, especially in a digital and social media world that often pressures us to conform. Self-discovery is always the key to self-help, growth and success. Start by baby steps to understand your characters, interests and values, and to remind yourself that you can be you.

Acknowledge that vulnerability is strength too, and that authentic connection is far more rewarding than fleeting validation. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but the freedom and genuine connection you’ll experience are worth the effort.

Instead of faking it to be superficially liked and embraced, focus on becoming yourself day by day to let you be the first one to accept and embrace your own self.